Monday, April 28, 2003

So I'm trying to turn over a new leaf. I'm 31 today, closer to 35 than 25, feeling overweight and a little gassy. But I'm going to try to collect my thoughts here for no other reason than my own entertainment, since no one probably comes here anymore because, once I started going to bars in Japan, I basically stopped posting. I was inspired by a column I read in last Sunday's New York Times which you can check out at: . It didn't motivate me to run a marathon or do anything meaningful with my life, just simply jot down my random thoughts which entertain me but not really anyone else. I hope you also don't think I'm a snooty New York Times reader. There is just a huge dropoff in terms of journalistic quality in New York City - from the NY Times to the Post/Daily News/etc. And, unless you're going to a bar or a restaurant, there's not that much to do in New York City, so getting through the voluminous 28 sections of the Sunday edition was about the only thing that keeps me off the couch (instead, I go to a park bench to read the paper. Much more active.) Now my brother thinks it's kind of ludicrous of me to make this statement about the City that Never Sleeps. But really, how many times can you go to a museum? I go see a show about once every two months, so I'm taking advantage of that angle. Going running in Central Park - that is good, but if you live in Brooklyn, particularly Ghetto Brooklyn like I do, this involves a 45 minute subway each way to the park. There are no lockers at the park, so once you run and get all sweaty (I can just see those of you who know I sweaty I get wincing as you read that), you have to hop back on the train for another 45 minutes to yucko Brooklyn to shower (yes, I do shower). Then, you'll want a nice meal to cap off the fact that you were productive, so you have get back on the train again and head back into Manhattan. I mean, I suppose in most cities the #1 entertainment involves drinking and eating, and every city is what you make it, blah blah blah. I did do some great people watching in Greenich Village though yesterday. Then, in the late afternoon, I went home, got naked, and laid on the couch and watched The Simpsons. Can't beat that kind of entertainment.

So if you've made it this far you probably figure that you haven't missed much by the fact that I haven't posted in a while. And you would be right, as exhibited by the previous paragraph. I am starting to get a little nervous about all this litigation about downloading music, though. Let's just say I've obtained my fair share of music, and let's just say it was free, and let's just say I do it a lot. That's not going to get me thrown in jail, would it?

Monday, January 21, 2002

So I know it’s been awhile since I’ve updated this diary. Contrary to popular belief, it is not because I am monumentally lazy. Aki got very sick for a little bit and it kind of put me out of the mood for writing. The upside to this, however, is that we got a first hand look at socialized medicine. This messy thing that we think only Canada and Hilary Clinton support is actually the way most other industrialized countries deliver their health care.
The hospital that we went to is a stone’s throw away from the Yokohama International Stadium, site of the World Cup Final and about a 10 minute walk from our house. This will probably be very convenient come World Cup time, since Japanese merchants and police are extremely scared about very serious Soccer Hooliganism (yes, it is apparently a popular and serious word outside of the United States, this term for the drunken violence and shenanigans that ensue after a soccer game. Every time I hear it or read it, I have to let out a little giggle. There is at least one article about it a week in the Japanese newspaper).
The hospital’s modern and pleasant appearance really surprised me. I always pictured the delivery of socialized medicine as a chaotic environment, with people screaming about how they have been waiting for days to receive medical treatment and chickens running around everywhere. The only real inconvenience was that Aki had to always be accompanied by someone who could translate for her. One time, a Caucasian American woman named Andrea accompanied her to the hospital to translate for her (Andrea is fluent in Japanese). All the hospital staff thought Aki was translating for Andrea, it was kinda funny. Most doctors actually speak a high degree of English, but like most Japanese, they are embarrassed by their pronunciation and therefore refuse to speak it. The first time Aki went to the hospital, the doctor had to draw a picture to illustrate what he was saying. I started laughing immediately, because the doctor, like most of my English students and I think most Japanese people, all draw people the same way. If you have seen ANY type of Japanese cartoon or anime, this is how all (or seemingly all, anyway) Japanese people draw. The characters are all drawn with ridiculously emphasized smiles and extremely large eyes (especially funny since Japanese eyes are, obviously, very narrow). Female Japanese anime characters are usually drawn with overly huge breasts and over-emphasized body curves. In case you’re wondering, the doctor only drew Aki’s face.
For those who are wondering what’s the price tag for this universal health coverage, it can add up. The government takes a certain percentage of your salary, depending on how much you make. This money not only goes toward your health coverage, but also towards a retirement account the government maintains for you. If you somehow miraculously don’t tap into your medical account for four years, you are eligible for Kyufu, where the government will pay for any continuing education you wish for one year (surprisingly, many of the students at my English language school use this to pay for their classes). On top of that, when you visit the hospital for anything, there is a flat 20% deductible. Not good if you’re getting a liver transplant. On top of all that, national health insurance only covers essential health care. You are 100% responsible for non-essential treatment (unless you are lucky and the company you are employed by happens to have supplemental insurance – only at the Sonys, Toyotas, etc.) Such luxuries as pregnancies, dental check-ups, eye glasses, Rogaine/Viagra are classified as non-essential. I’ve actually attributed socialized medicine to the reason why it seems dental hygiene is so horrible outside of the US – people simply can’t afford to fight Mr.Tooth Decay. Doctors don’t have it much better, either. It’s still a high-prestige, relatively high-salary job. But, I had an English student who was an ENT doctor, and he said he sees about 50-70 patients in a typical seven hour day.
Since we’ve been here, we’ve taken two trips. First, we went to Hakone, which is the area surrounding Mt. Fuji. It’s only about 1.5 hours away by train. It’s an extremely beautiful area set in a huge mountain range. Once you leave the Tokyo/Yokohama city area, the geography takes on a very Northern California type of feel. Even now the winter is cold but mild compared to other cities at this latitude (New York City, for example). It’s a much quicker drive out to Hakone, but we don’t have a car. Not to mention every highway going in, going out, or going through the Tokyo/Yokohama area is a toll road. You can expect to pay a toll for traveling as little as 3 km (1.8 miles). The toll from Yokohama to Tokyo is Y600 ($4.50). (The drive is equivalent to driving from San Jose-San Francisco, Ft. Lauderdale-Miami, or Dayton-Cincinnati). Tack on the fact that it can cost Y20,000 ($180) a month for parking for your car at your HOUSE and the outrageous gas prices (Y92/Liter ($2.23/gallon)), and you’d wonder why anyone would own a car.
But so many people do. As absurdly crowded as the trains are, if you look out at the highway or road you’re passing, there is traffic. Many of the students that I have own cars and drive them about three or four times a month! I’m sure all of you are familiar with the Bad Driver Asian Stereotype in America….the funny thing is that here, many of my students admit to being horrible drivers! The roads here are frighteningly narrow (because of the lack of land). Near our house, which is a residential area that is about a six-minute walk from major roadways, the roads are only wide enough for one car, but two-way traffic is expected to flow on them. When cars pass each other going in the opposite direction, they have to slow down and one has to creep up on the curb while the other passes (I don’t think there is any system to who pulls over, either; I’ve seen a couple of standoffs where the cars just kind of sit there and stare at each other until one person finally caves in and reverses his/her car onto the side of the road). The smaller roads in Japan obviously results in smaller cars. But I still see a lot full size sedans, mini-vans, SUVs, etc. on the road. I have no idea how people maneuver these vehicles on such small roads. Freight trucks, construction trucks, garbage trucks, etc. all look like cute little Tonka-trucks over here though. They’re shrunk down to about ¾ of their size (as compared to the US).
We haven’t driven in a car over here but we have been in several taxis. The only similarity between taxis here and in the US is that taxi drivers don’t speak English. Otherwise, taxis over here are a class operation. First of all, the rear doors open and close automatically, which doesn’t sound like a big deal, but when you’ve had a lot to drink, it’s the coolest thing in the world to see a cab pull up and have the door pop open – then crawl inside as it automatically shuts behind you. All the cab drivers wear white gloves and uniforms that give them that New York Doorman kind of look. The seats are covered with doilies (sp?) and smell cleaner than most of my clothes. It does come with a price tag, however. A 1/3 mile cab ride is about Y1000 ($8.00) (Yes, we took a taxi ride for only 1/3 of a mile, but it was because we missed the last train and had no idea how to get back to our apartment…)
So back to Hakone. There is an incredible open-air art museum with some really cool statues and a great Picasso exhibit. The museum is half-way up a mountain near Mt. Fuji on a plateau, with incredible scenery in every direction. There is a lot of volcanic activity in this area, and this had led to the formation of an incredibly large sulfur mine. We took a cable car ride over this area and it smelled disgusting. It is apparently good luck to eat a hard-boiled egg from the heat of the sulfur and many people do it when they’re in the area (yeah, we skipped that). Hakone is also famous for its many onsens, or hot springs. Japanese people are crazy about these things. Because of all the volcanic activity that I mentioned earlier, there are literally hundreds of natural hot springs in and around the Tokyo/Yokohama area. Apparently in the “olden days” (I have no idea what timeframe in Japanese history), homes did not have their own baths, so there were many communal baths throughout the country. The guest house that we stayed at (Fuji-Hakone Guest House, – this is also, incidentally, where I proposed to Aki) had its own private onsen. You go in naked, but the water is unbelievably hot. Aki and I only made it in mid-thigh, it didn’t think it would be wise to submerse other valuable parts of my anatomy into that scalding water. I want to make another attempt at a different onsen, because all of my students rave about them. Maybe we can throw some ice in or something.
Even though we were so close to Mt. Fuji (“Fuji-san”), the hazy weather prevented us from seeing it. We intend to climb it (2 day trek up) when it re-opens for hiking in May. There, the beautiful Lake Ashi surrounds the area, as well as several shrines. These Shinto/Buddhist temples are amazing, and built in a beautiful natural setting. Our second trip, to Nikko (about a 2 hour train trip north of Tokyo), gave us a view of even more beautiful and larger shrines, in a beautiful snow-filled setting. Nikko was the home of a very large Buddhist sect in about 700 AD. This is where the original wooden relief sculpture of the 3 monkeys (hear no evil, speak no evil, see no evil) is found. We stayed at another guest house there and, for the second-time in a row, did not get a room with a bed.
Traditional Japanese sleeping takes place on a futon. These are not the thick staples found in the living rooms of college students in America, but rather a one inch thin twin-sized mat that you throw a sheet on and you’re supposed sleep on. The bedroom typically is a tatami mat room. Tatami mats are bamboo mats that are about 5’8” long and about 3’ wide. The mats are on the floor of the bedroom much like carpeting and are supposed to prevent the futons from getting moldy. Our landlord had put in new tatami mats when I first arrived and the smell was funky, but now I never notice it (I don’t know if I’m used to it or if it just goes away, probably a combination of both). Small studio apartments and rooms in “Gaijin Houses” usually advertise their size in tatami mat dimensions – in Tokyo, a 3 x 3 tatatmi mat room will go for about Y40,000 – Y70,000/month. “Gaijin” is the Japanese word for “foreigner”. A Gaijin House is a dormitory-style apartment for foreigners. This is much more convenient and cheaper than renting a real apartment (many Japanese landlords are wary of renting to foreigners; additionally, Japanese apartments require first month’s rent, deposit and key money, a non-refundable, upfront “gift” to the landlord usually worth two or three times the monthly rent). Almost all of my Japanese students sleep on beds, ironically. Our apartment, thankfully, is subsidized by Aki’s work. They paid our key money and also pay half of our Y140,000/month rent. Our apartment is a one-bedroom that is, surprisingly, larger than our studio was in San Francisco. But everything in it is small – the bathroom, the kitchen, even the refrigerator.
One night we went to a part of Tokyo called Akihabara, known as “Electric Town”. There are literally about 10,000 electronic stores in this area, where you can get every conceivable electronic device in existence. You feel like you’re at Mardi Gras when you’re walking around – the crowded streets, the flashing bright lights and the annoyingly loud music. I can’t understand how ALL of these stores stay in business, they all sell the exact same products and use countless watts of electricity to fuel the obnoxious flashing lights attempting to attract attention to their store in a sea of a thousand other annoying lights. But apparently they all do. The most popular thing seemingly was the automotive GPS (Global Positioning System, which allows you to plot your location and routes to any address you want to go – a few steps short of actually having the car drive for you). GPSs are standard on cars in Japan produced in the last year or two; anyone who has an older car, however, has found them to be a necessity. According to my friend’s girlfriend, who is Japanese, very few Japanese streets actually have names and the roads do not follow the friendly grid-like system that we have in the US, so it is impossible to navigate Tokyo or Yokohama without one – they’re practically a necessity. Cars older than five years are rarely seen on the road, however. While its commonplace to see tons of cars from the 60s, 70s, 80s and early 90s on the road in the US, I have yet to see one here. Part of Japanese culture is the value of things that are new, so it is not unusual for everyone (not just people who are rich stockbrokers) to buy a new car every few years or so. Same with mobile phones as well. Aki’s phone, which is light years ahead of any phone in the US, is actually an older model that she picked up dirt cheap.
Perhaps this is why the national pastime appears to be shopping. Like I mentioned before, it seems that every time I’m on the train, there are shopping bags everywhere. Most of my students, who are female, always come to class with shopping bags of one store or another. The king of all shopping in Japan is in a part of Tokyo called Ginza. Ginza is the high-priced shopping area with a very New York feel. Department stores and boutique stores abound everywhere, as well as high priced restaurants. There is a very cool seven story Sony building there where you can play all day (I spent a few hours there on computers, stereos, playing video games and watching DVDs). Whenever Japanese people leave the house, they are usually dressed-up and well put together. This is even extremely so in Ginza. (Aki actually asked a friend of hers why Japanese people get so dressed up whenever they leave the house, and her friend’s reply was that “maybe it is because our hair is so limp, that to get it to do anything, we have to spend a lot time styling it, and so we figure we might as well get dressed up too.”) I happened to go there during Christmas time, and the place was a madhouse. Christmas is heavily advertised in Japan, and stores put out their Christmas displays, play loud Christmas music and have “Holiday Sales”, but no one actually celebrates Christmas over here (only about 1% of the 180 million people in Japan are even Christian, but stores are stores, no matter what country they are in, and they’ll never miss a chance to encourage people to buy). Christmas is viewed as a “couples holiday”. I think this is a euphemism for “Hallmark Holiday”. Japanese people will buy Christmas presents for their wives/husbands, girlfriends/boyfriends, etc. but not for the family as a whole. Younger Japanese people will spend Christmas Eve/Christmas Night with their friends or with their significant others (restaurants are particularly crowded on these two days).
The major holiday over here and closest equivalent to Christmas is New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. People send out New Year’s cards instead of Christmas cards. Families are usually obligated to spend these two days together (though the club we went to for New Year’s Eve was packed with Japanese people). Mothers cook “osechi” (sp?), best described as a Japanese meat and vegetable soup. In older days, women would cook this meal because it was easy to prepare a large amount. They would make this before New Year’s, then eat it for the first three days of the new year, thereby earning the women a well-deserved break. One of Aki’s friends invited us over to try some. It was pretty good (AND good for you.) Japanese people will spend one if not both of these days (12.31 and 01.01) at the local Shinto/Buddhist Temple. We went to one of the larger and famous temples in the Tokyo/Yokohama area, Kawasaki-Daishi. It was in a very neat part of Kawasaki, just outside of Tokyo, that actually looked like how I pictured Japan (instead of very western, with Starbucks on every corner that I see). There are many street vendors selling some incredible Japanese food, including sushi, yakitori, yaki-soba, ramen, udon, okinomiyake, to name a few (see for more on Japanese food. My favorite Japanese food, mainly because of its cost (Y100, about $0.80), is onigri, or rice ball. Imagine a 1.25 inch equilateral triangle, about one inch thick, of rice. Dug into this solid triangle of rice is some tuna and mayonnaise. This is wrapped in a piece of dry seaweed. I know this sounds disgusting (even as I type this it sounds disgusting) but these are the best things I’ve ever eaten, ever. I eat like four or five a day (they are very small). You can get them with a variety of other things in them, but I usually have no idea what they are, so I usually just play it safe with the tuna). The streets were crowded wall-to-wall with people as we waited in line for an hour and forty-five minutes to get to the temple. The temple is huge and beautiful. Getting inside was a bit anti-climatic, however. Once inside, you throw your money into a big money bin (go (5) yen, which has some traditional significance because 5 yen is literally said as “go-en” in Japanese, which also doubles as the word for relationships, and when you pray at the temple, you pray for all your relationships. Some people must have many, many relationships because there were quite a few 1000 and 5000 yen bills in the pile) and you have about 10-60 seconds to pray before the crowds start to push you out. At most temples, you can buy a small wooden plate for about $5 and write a prayer/wish on it, then hang it next to the Temple. It will stay there for the next year and it should come true (we did this and prayed for the happiness of our friends, so you owe us if any of you strike it rich). You can also spend about $1 on a fortune that is dispensed from a machine. If you don’t like your fortune, you tie it to a fence or a tree near the temple. Many people must get bad fortunes because there are a lot of bad fortunes tied to different trees and fences. Your dream on New Year’s Eve is also supposed to be your fortune for the upcoming year. I had some weird dream about a field trip I took in the third grade and then at the end our school bus was being chased by a giant caterpillar, so I’m not sure what that means. Whenever my Japanese students told me that they were going to a temple for New Year’s, however, they quickly commented that it was not for religious reasons, just traditional. Japan is pretty much a country without religion (aside from the cooky 1% that are Christians). To the surprise I’m sure of a lot of church institutions in America, there is no religion here, but crime, drug use, teen pregnancy, etc. are all significantly, significantly, significantly lower here. Hmmmm……
Ginza is also home to two things that I’ve enjoyed here in Japan – The Tsujiki Fish Market and the Kabuki Theater. The Tsujiki Fish Market is the biggest fish market in the country and ALL of the fish sold in the Tokyo/Yokohama area comes through this market (it’s the region’s largest wholesaler; if you’re buying fish in a restaurant or grocery store, it has probably come from this fish market). It opens at about 4AM, and the auctioning off of ridiculously huge fish begins. This part is closed to the public, unfortunately. But I did go there relatively early, around 8:30AM. It’s like an incredible fair with vendors selling any and all kinds of fish, of various colors and smells. The screaming is deafening and hilarious, with different vendors proclaiming in Japanese why you should buy their fish (at least, I think that is what they are yelling. They could be all yelling at me to get out of the market, for all I know). I mentioned before that the exorbitant use of Japan’s constrained natural resources (plastic, fuel, electricity) was shocking, but here in the fish market, the exact opposite is true. Every possible creature and part of the fish is eventually eaten or used, somehow. There is a relatively inexpensive sushi restaurant (even in Japan, sushi is still expensive. Who knew?) right in the middle of the fish market, and the sushi that is served there was swimming in the ocean a mere hours ago. I ate breakfast there, and the workers at this restaurant were so funny and friendly that it was entertainment in itself. One of the sushi chefs, about 25, struck up a conversation with me, where I learned that his favorite kind of music is “R&B” and that his favorite band is “Destiny’s Child” because “they are really hot” (see, there really isn’t much difference between men of different cultures).
The Kabuki Theater is really an experience. Kabuki is traditional Japanese theater that has been going on since the 1600s (the time of SHOGUN). When Japanese people explain Kabuki to me, they usually compare it to Shakespearean theatre – its Japanese is “old style Japanese”, which is difficult for even native Japanese speakers to understand, and the plays always have a very strong moral to them. Usually, only older people tend to see Kabuki theater, anyone that I’ve talked to under 30 has never, ever been and kind of look at me funny when I tell them that I went. Only men can act in Kabuki plays, and therefore women roles are played by men (sometimes you have to struggle to remember this, because they look really, really, good). The costumes are elaborate and very showy. Kabuki shows last for four hours, with four separate stories, each followed by an intermission. We thankfully had an earpiece which translated all the action into English, even though after four hours the guy’s voice on the tape got kind of annoying. The first story was based on a Chinese Buddhist parable about a Buddhist priest and his three disciples voyage where they get caught by some Spider Demons. One of the Buddhist priest’s disciples is a magical monkey, however, and uses his magic to save the day. This was followed by lunch. (We went to the morning show, which lasts from 11 AM – 4PM). Many of the people in the audience were older Japanese, and during the second show, the lunch must have gotten to them because half of the audience was asleep – this kept me laughing every time I looked around. The second story was about a shogun warrior who ends up killing his own daughter because of his commitment to duty. The play is especially interesting, because it is based on a play originally written for Japanese puppet theatre, a very serious art over here (think “Being John Malkovic”). The actors all imitate the intricate movements of the puppets, and in fact move like life-size puppets – it’s pretty neat. The third story was about a very ugly princess who is very kind. She gets a proposal from a very handsome prince, but knows he is only doing it just to be nice, so she leaves (how fickle are women???). Finally, the last act was about a communal bath attendant who fights germs and has a slug fall in love with him (this was actually the best one, I found it very funny and it was actually intended to be funny). My favorite characters throughout the entire day, however, were the Men in Black. These were stage people who were dressed in all black ninja-like outfits. Whenever there was a scene on stage that required some kind of background activity (i.e., clean up, place a stool here, untie the curtain, unfurl a character’s robes, etc.) the Men in Black would “sneak” on to the stage, hiding behind various props or even the actors themselves (so they wouldn’t be noticed) and then do whatever they had to do. I know this explanation doesn’t do it any justice but trust me, it was hilarious.
Daily life, to reiterate, is not significantly different from America. It’s the aggregate sum of the little things that constantly let you know you’re in a different country though (the wardrobe of a mini-skirt, fishnet stockings and knee high boots worn by most Japanese women under 50 in the middle of winter, for instance). I startle myself sometimes when the chatter of Japanese around me doesn’t seem to phase me. Usually, the only time the language difference is thrown in your face (after you’ve been living here for a while, obviously; if you’re fresh off the boat then you’ll probably notice it) is when you enter a store. No matter what store, no matter how classy or cheap, you will be greeted by a deafening chorus of “IRUH-SHIMAH-SAY” by all the employees who happen to notice you walk in (Japanese for “Welcome!”). Grocery shopping is an adventure here, and as I mentioned earlier, convenience stores are tantamount to Mecca. You can pick up a hot can of coffee or a hot can of corn soup, breakfast/lunch/dinner obento boxes, packages of sushi/sashimi, nudie magazines, a tallboy of Sapporo, anything you want. I have never seen as many people in professional clothing in a 7-11 as I have over here. Especially popular are “hybrid” grocery-convenience stores (there is one on the first floor of our building that, unfortunately for my diet, sells Oreos.) These stores have all the staples of convenience stores but receive fresh produce and meat daily as well, so you could actually shop there every day if you wanted produce that will last for about 1.5 days or pay the premium price for the convenience (Y575 for 3 shrink-wrapped bananas).
Restaurant and bar prices are much pricier here too. It is not unusual to see a martini for Y1000, Y700 for a beer or a small bowl of ramen for about Y600 (don’t think of the ramen you survived on in college for $0.75 – the stuff over here is really good. Very near our house is the Ramen Museum, if you ever visit). On the other hand, tipping is unheard of in Japan (except of course at the cheesy American-run bars that cater to American service men and the Japanese women who love them in a morally casual kind of way. I was actually at one of these bars once (yeah, like you thought I was above it or something) and a Japanese girl walked right up to one of friends (not me, of course) and the first thing she said was, “What ship are you on?”). So the prices are a tad higher, but no tipping. Ironically, there is no tipping and the service here is impeccable. Whenever you want service, you simply raise your hand to a passing server and they will serve you; if there isn’t a server in sight, you simply yell “SUMIMASEN” (you are literally yelling “Excuse Me!”) and out of thin air a server appears. The servers all have wireless devices that they punch your order into and zaps it back to the kitchen (enabling any server to take you order and update your bill in real-time. Can you tell I’m a computer geek??) I don’t know how many times in the US I’ve left a 15% tip when I thought the service was atrocious; here I leave nothing and I get treated like a celebrity.
The impeccable service kind of fits in with the cultural stereotype that Japanese people are extremely polite (and, as my mom said right in front of Aki the first time she met her, “I think it’s great you guys are together, since Japanese people are so tidy.” The sad part was that she wasn’t trying to be funny.) But Japanese people have a dark side too. They will say good morning to you as you pass them on the street, but when it’s time to get on a train, all bets are off and it’s every man for himself. I got shoved out of the way while running towards a crowded train by a very old lady. I get shoved pretty regularly around here, actually, though I’m pretty sure I weigh the same as about three average-sized Japanese adult men put together. Walking in this country tends to confuse me in general. You may think this is because I’m very stupid, but you’d only be half-right. The “right of way” over here is to stay to the left, if that makes sense. But every now and then people will stay to the right. There must be some kind of secret code that they understand that I don’t understand that tells them what side to walk on (more popularly known as “the Japanese Language”). In Shibuya, a shopping/social district in Tokyo, there is a 6-way pedestrian crossing, it’s quite a impressive to actually see it, maybe I’ll get a camera (I’m sure I can find one here in Japan) and take a picture of it. At most major streets, however, to keep the traffic moving, all the pedestrian crossing is done via walkways above the street, to maximize the flow of traffic. The ingenuity of the Japanese motivated by the necessity to save space and time is amazing. At many parking garages, you drive your car into a “carousel” and then get of it. The carousel rotates up and into the garage and places the car, somehow in an open space. Basically, the space that people drive around through in parking lots/garages looking for spots is not wasted here. At gas stations, there are no gas pumps on “islands”; the gas pumps dangle from an overhead roof to maximize the space that cars can come into the gas station. They sell storage bags which come with a vacuum which sucks out the excess air from the bag to minimize the storage space. Garbage is separated into “burnable” and “nonburnable” trash. Thankfully, we live in an apartment building and it is hard to determine whose trash is whose, but I have friends who live in rental houses who put their trash out on the wrong day (burnable trash out on a nonburnable pick up day) and their Japanese neighbors will return it to their doorstep. With all this stress on convenience, however, banks over here confuse the hell out of me. ATMs are king in America, and I think my parents are the only people in the US that do not own, have never used and never will use an ATM card. In Europe, they are not as prevalent, but if you look long enough, you will eventually find one and it will be available 24 hours a day. In Japan, however, ATMs operate on the same hours as the bank and are usually only located near or in banks, thereby rendering them useless in my mind. So, if you use the ATM after 3PM there is a surcharge. If you use the ATM on a Sunday there is a surcharge. On the first three days of the new year, all the banks AND all the ATMs were closed for all three days, unbeknownst to me (thankfully I have a fiancée I can mooch off of, who apparently knew and didn’t tell me. There’s some love for ya.) The concept of a “check” does not exist here, so you’re pretty much screwed if you didn’t get out enough money before those three days. Since there is no checking system, you take the bills that are mailed to your house to…guess where…the local convenience store and pay them there.
Other aspects of daily life include Japanese TV (or lack thereof). About 70% of all the shows on Japanese TV are variety shows. Examples: a show with high school girls that show them racing to see who can make up their beds the fastest; the ever popular food racing show, featuring head-to-head eat-offs (some guy ate 40 pieces of sushi in about 1 minute); a show where some already wealthy celebrities get to sample free exquisite cuisine and then guess how much it would cost in a restaurant; a show (which I’m convinced is some kind of propaganda meant to discourage interracial marriage) which shows real-life couples which feature a Japanese male and non-Japanese female (I saw a one couple where a Japanese guy was married to a Russian woman that bossed him around constantly); news programs which use hand-made posters and maps instead of electronic graphics to show weather forecasts or financial information (ironic in high-tech Japan); a game show which pits two teams of two men each against each other to determine the weight and/or bra size of a bikini-clad woman by such scientifically precise methods as lifting her up by any body part desired or laying down in a bed with her and groping her. On a daily basis you will also see and/or hear the Imperialists or Hate Buses. The Imperialists drive trucks around Tokyo and Yokohama (they are seemingly everywhere) every day playing music and spouting rhetoric about returning to the old imperial Japanese ways. The Hate Buses are huge black buses which, on a daily basis, play music and spout rhetoric preaching nationalism and Japanese racial supremacy. There are also what I dub the “God” buses, small trucks playing music and spouting rhetoric about Jesus (they also had people holding banners that read “JESUS SAVES” around all the temples and shrines on new year’s).
OK, this is the end of this post. I PROMISE I will post much more often. Hope all of you are safe and enjoying life!

Wednesday, October 31, 2001

Here are some general observations so far about living in Japan: (posted 10.30.01)

- Tokyo and Yokohama are huge. The two largest cities in Japan and certainly in the top 5 in size in the US. They are completely modern and do not have too much in the way of "traditional Japanese" stuff - temples, statues, shrines, etc. Yokohama even has a China town, and an area with a ferris wheel and amusement park that reminds me of the all those county fairs in Florida, though there is no country music or hay. It really feels just like home, like any US city. Except for all the Japanese people, of course. Tokyo is about 10 million and Yokohama about 6 million people. The center of Yokohama is about 30 minutes by train away from the center of Tokyo.

- The subways are unbelievable. I've been on the New York Subway system, the Tube in London, the subway systems in Chicago, Toronto and Paris, but the subways here are out of this world simply because of the sheer volume of people who travel on them. There are uniformed men with white gloves whose sole job is to push people onto the train, so the doors will have enough clearance to close. It is very common and very funny for a train go by and to see peoples’ faces literally flattened against the cold plastic of the train door. The Shinjuku station in Tokyo is the busiest train station in the world, with over million people passing through its doors everyday.

- For a country that is so resource constrained, the Japanese do many things that seem wasteful. The neon lights here put everything in Vegas to shame. At any major intersection or any district where there are a lot of people, there are neon lights EVERYWHERE. Digital signs, bright lights, electronic billboards. EVERYWHERE. When I post some pictures maybe you will be able to slightly appreciate this phenomenon. There are digital TVs that are the width of a skyscraper building and easily about 10 stories tall. There is not just one, but multiple. In addition to this exorbitant use of wattage, the Japanese are obsessed with packaging. Bundles of bananas are shrink wrapped in plastic. Apples, broccoli, cucumbers, all the vegetable and fruits that are laying around in the open in any US grocery store are protected in plastic. Part of the reason is the notion of the “gift fruit”, or fruits and vegetables that are intended to be given as gifts rather than personal consumption. But at any store, be it clothing, electronics, fast food (yes, I have eaten at McDonald’s here, surprise, surprise), everything is placed in a plastic bag then that bag is placed in another plastic bag. The irony of this situation, however, is really demonstrated at the grocery store. They use all this plastic wrapping fruits and vegetables, and then for some reason they feel the need to try to stuff all of your groceries in the fewest number of plastic bags possible.

- Speaking of food, the Japanese people are ridiculously skinny. Maybe this explains their thorough enjoyment of Sumo wrestling, I don’t know. I think there are several reasons contributing to this. First, there is virtually no bread in the Japanese diet. The grocery stores sell bread, but they bags contain about eight slices. The carbohydrates in their diet are really limited to whole wheat and whole grain sources, which are way, way better for you. Second, the portion sizes here are a fraction of the size in the US. At McDonald’s, don’t try order the Super Size expecting the vat of coke and bucket of French fries. The biggest size you can get is equivalent to a medium at home. But even at their restaurants, a plate of any food is about half of what you would get in the US. Another reason is the big presence of soy (soybeans, edamame, tofu, etc.) in their diets. A typical traditional Japanese breakfast (that I have yet to try) is natto and rice. Natto is some kind of cured soybean that I am told smells horribly, but I still want to try it. Japanese people also eat chicken/beef no more than a few times a month, with the majority of their meals being served with fish (not necessarily sushi, or osushi, as it is referred to here). Finally, as expensive as vegetables are here, they are a huge part of every meal. Aki and I are like giants here, and we are definitely trying to lose as much weight as possible to fit in. That said, you can get any kind of food you want here. Fast food, Italian, French, German, Japanese, Chinese, Thai, Indian, etc., and these places are always packed with Japanese people.

- Starbucks is huge here. Starbucks Japan just went public and it is the NSE’s hottest stock. If I had money, I would invest. There is no other company even close to cornering the market (Pete’s, Caribou, etc. aren’t even here), and the local Japanese chains barely come close. Of course, as with all portion sizes, the largest coffee you can get at Starbucks is equivalent to a medium back home. Price of a small cup of coffee at Starbucks (which looks about the size of an espresso shot you would get back home): 298Yen to 361Y for a large (at roughly 120Y/$, that is $2.38 - $2.88). Of course, there are the ever present vending machines here in Japan, where you can both cold and hot cans of coffee, an eight ounce can going for 120Y. It’s not anywhere near Starbucks quality, but if you want some caffeine, this is a good quick hit.

- Cell phones (a “keitai”, pronounced “kay-tie”) are huge here, as they are in most industrialized countries outside of North America. The main reason they are so big here and in Europe is because land lines, or our traditional AT&T, et al phone infrastructure blows away anything else in the world and is way cheaper. So it is much cheaper and reliable over here to get a cell phone. The thing about Japanese cell phones, however, is that they blow away anything in the US. You think your slick little Nokia is the coolest thing on the planet? Think again. DoCoMo and J-Phone make stuff that is two or three generations ahead. Surf the web, play mp3s, take digital pictures, make plane/train/movie/English lesson/restaurant reservations all from your phone, all reliably, all cheap (this is in the US, but few and far between and not enough places have the architecture to support this “i-mode”).

- As with many of my perceived notions about Japan, smoking isn’t as prevalent here as people think (“Everyone smokes in Japan!!!”) But, there are vending machines everywhere that you can purchase cigarettes at. The smoking and drinking age is 20, and the new machines have a slot for you to insert your ID before it will sell the beer/cigarette to you (yes, beer is available at vending machines too, though not as widespread as the cigarette machines), but these new machines are rare. Cigarettes go for as cheap as 250Y ($2). You can pretty much smoke anywhere you want to, too (except on the trains).

- Women make quite the fashion statement here, and in general I’m still figuring out what their deal this. As I said before, all the women here are bone skinny. For the few and far between chunky ones, they are so out of luck, they better have a damn good personality because there are 50 bone skinny women for every one slightly chunky Japanese woman I see. Also, older Japanese women are so skinny and fit that it’s hard to place anyone’s age, but for the women that ‘look’ 20 – 40, the typical dress is a very short mini-skirt accompanied with knee-high leather boots, the leather boots being equipped with stiletto heels. It is always amusing to be riding an escalator and seeing an older Japanese man as he looks up the escalator to take a peek up these short skirts (more on the sexual nature of the Japanese later). Even the high school girls’ uniform is a short mini-skirt, penny-loafers, knee-high puffy socks (think 80s aerobics classes) and a blue cardigan. I’ve been on the train at almost every possible time, and I always see women carrying shopping bags. Shopping is huge over here, I mean it puts LA and NY to shame. It doesn’t appear that many of these women have jobs, but yet they are always shopping. For a country that has been in a recession for a long time, you would never be able to tell by all the damn shopping bags you see people carrying. I have no idea what percentage of the workforce is female, but it is low in comparison to the US. At the English language school that I teach at, about 50% of our customers are single women in their 20s (oh yeah), and they don’t work, many of them live at home. It got so bad that I stopped asking what their jobs were. But they are decked out in the latest fashions in clothes that do not look cheap. So they are living off mommy and daddy or some salary man somewhere.

- Salarymen are another group that I am trying to figure out. A salaryman is the term used for any man that works for a company. The Japanese traditions of being “hired for life” and promotion by seniority are still alive and well. Also, casual work dress isn’t very big here, so a rush hour train is full of people packed cheek to cheek in their suits (stylish, trendy Prada suits for the young, traditional stiff suits for the older men). Salarymen are pretty much at the mercy of their company and the economic environment right now (though the shopping doesn’t seem to indicate it) is very cold so everyone is doing whatever it takes to hold on to their job. Salarymen work from 9AM to about 8PM every day, including Saturdays (it is very common to see lots of suits on the train on both Saturday and Sunday). After 8PM, no time to go home, because it’s time to go out drinking! This is probably the coolest part about being a salaryman. You are pretty much expected to go out and get tanked after work with your peers, this is an accepted, unwritten rule and wives, girlfriends, mothers, etc. don’t question it. Ride the last train (about 12:45AM during the week) on any given weeknight, and you will see many a salaryman on the train reeking of alcohol. On a Wednesday night, we saw a salaryman laying face first on the ground of the train station, drunk and passed out, briefcase in hand. People simply walked around him. On a Monday night, we saw a drunk salary man passed out in the bushes outside of a bar. Most of the young salarymen, I have no idea what their salary is, but Aki is making about $2200 after taxes per month (the misconception of “teachers being treated like doctors” is also false, more later), so I would hope that would at least double that. But most salarymen I am told live at home or in corporate dormitory housing (living in a dorm when you have a job…hmmm…could be cool for a while, I think….). I had a salaryman as a student the other night, for a 9:15PM lesson. I could smell the beer on his breath, but thankfully he wasn’t drunk.

- Teachers in Japan and the much heralded Japanese educational system…my only reaction to this is “what a fucking joke!” Pardon my language, but after listening and reading for the last two years about how horrible American schools are and how great they are here in Japan, it really changed my perspective about the job teachers are doing in the US, where we are actually, genuinely, whole-heartedly are at least attempting to educate everyone, whether they want it or not. Aki teaches at Kawasaki High School, what could best be described as an “upper middle class” area. Most teachers straight-out lecture, nothing else fancy. Students pay attention…or don’t. Many talk to each other, pass notes, play on their cell phones. Teachers do not discipline them, and they don’t even think of calling home. Failing a student is unheard of, because of the backlash the school would receive. Teachers teach about 3 classes a day. I think the perception of Japanese students being so hard working is due to the College Admissions Test. To even be considered for college, a Japanese student has to pass a test. This test is comprehensive, all subjects, and is way harder than the SAT. The score on this test is way more important than your grades and a minimum score is needed just to be considered, much less if you are applying to a top school, then your scores need to be way higher. So the students who want to go to college, and are sufficiently motivated by themselves or their parents, go to extra cram schools to specifically prepare for this test, beyond the normal high school. If the math and science test scores of American high school students were only taken for those students that were admitted to top 300 colleges in America, I think our scores would be close to the top if not the best. But, because we factor in everyone’s scores, regardless of whether they are college bound or not, we appear to have bad scores. To top it all off, teachers are paid less than all the other “professional” jobs here, just like in the US.

- My previous perception of Japanese sexuality was also way off. I held a stereotype of the Japanese people being very prude, stiff people. But sex/nudity is very open here, very European. Along with that, however, comes a very prevalent chauvinistic attitude within the culture. Women, as I discussed, dress very provocatively. There are also these magazines that men read, in public, on the train and elsewhere. They are “anime” magazines, or basically very thick comic books, but men of all ages (16 – 60) read them. These magazines depict a lot of violent and sexual images. They even have some live nude pictures as well. You may be laughing because you think that I am buying one of these everyday. But when I’m on the train, I can simply look over someone’s shoulder, since people just read these things wherever you want. You can pick them up at any convenience store (more on the power of the convenience store below). There is nudity and sexually explicit scenes, right there in cartoon anime, and the guy in the suit is just reading surrounded by all the other people on the train. Amazing. (no, I don’t wish the US was like that). (maybe, just kidding, or am I?). There are also a plethora of hostess bars, massage parlors, strip clubs, XXX cinemas. In Shibuya, a big bar/restaurant/shopping district, you will find an arcade next to a bar next to a hostess bar next to a strip club, on and on, for blocks and blocks. A hostess bar is not a strip club, but really hot women work there and they wear close to nothing. They hang out with you, listen to your problems, laugh at your stupid jokes. You have to pay about a $100 to get in and also buy your drinks and their drinks as well. If I were a hot woman, it actually wouldn’t be a bad gig, though laughing a bad drinks would get old, but I guess that’s why they have to buy you drinks.